Today I realized that there’s only eight more weeks until the newest member of our family comes into this world… and I’M FREAKING OUT! I’m not ready!
That was then…
Before my daughter was born, at the 32 week point in my pregnancy, everything was “done”. We had weeks of meals and baking stockpiled in the freezer. Her room was completely set up and organized. My hospital bag was packed as soon as my pregnancy was considered “viable”. My birth plan was written. My house was spotless. The car seat was installed. I had read all I needed to read (several times) and I was ready to become a mom.
This is now…
It’s different this time. Maybe things are different because I already have a child tying up my “spare” time. Regardless, I don’t operate well under these kinds of circumstances. I need organization. I thrive on it. My daughter came three weeks early. If this baby comes three weeks early I’m screwed!
I really need to see a complete, ready-to-go baby room.
The baby room is currently a storeroom of all our baby supplies.
The high chair, bassinet, crib, car seat and boxes of blankets, bottles, toys and onesies are piled in the room. We don’t even have the clothing bar hanging in the closet yet!
Our car still needs to be serviced before we install the car seat.
Our freezer is in need of a good purging so I can do some meal prep.
I have no energy to clean. I still need to tweak my birth plan and pack my hospital bag. I wanted to sew my own birthing gown but it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen… a burlap sack (or a run-of-the mill hospital gown) will have to do.
I also need to book a variety of dental, eye and therapist appointments before my health insurance policy ends. Lastly, call me selfish but I would like just one last massage and haircut before I’m the mom of two children.
What makes matters worse is everyone (including my doctor) keeps on asking me if I’m ready for this baby to be born. The answer is a great, big, emphatic NO!!! I’m not ready. I don’t think I’ll ever be ready. If I could cross my legs and hold this baby in until everything is done, I would!
What to do?
I’m hoping that by ranting about this I can get some motivation to do something. The other day I made a to do list and placed it prominently in the kitchen. I did this partially for my sanity (as I can’t function without a list) and partially as a bold hint to my dear husband, as it’s only a matter of time before I come unglued and I rear my ugly, freaking-out, stressed-to-the-max, face.
Regardless, this baby is about to enter the world. Whether it’s tomorrow or in eight weeks time, I have to resign to the fact that not everything will be done and ready. I guess I’m learning my first lesson as a mother of two children… you can’t, and never will, be able to do it all.
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Oh my goodness, sounds like you need that massage! I know it might not feel like it but you will survive if you cut that list in half and only do a bit of it. Babies just need feeding and love and some place warm to sleep. It doesn’t need to be a perfectly set up space, a cardboard box would do in an pinch ;o) Maybe it’s time to make two lists, one for you and one for other people to do… and then ask for some help, from your husband, family or friends. Even if it’s just for someone to take your wee girl to the park so you can have a nap (or spend 30min in the baby’s room). Good luck!
Ohhhh…the perils of baby #2. They get ripped off before they even leave the womb! I found it much easier to be ready when I didn’t have a wee one running around after me undoing everything I’ve done!
Early, though eh? I could count on both of mine being late, late, late…
I TOTALLY understand. We were in the midst of major kitchen renovations which had been delayed. Again. And were supposed to be done well before my due date. So when Baby #2 came 2 weeks early I still had no kitchen sink. Ha. Ha. I laugh now… sort of.
I like what Meg said about asking others for help. And, unfortunately, husbands don’t have the inside scoop when it comes to nesting, so I think posting the list is a good idea, too. Hang in there!!
WOW! You said everything I was feeling for the last 4 weeks of my pregnancy! LOL!
I kept saying I wasn’t ready, despite the daily contractions that started 4 weeks prior to my due date, I simply was not ready and I was determined to hold the baby in until everything was “done”. Plus, we had family visiting from both New York and Berlin, and I was not about to miss them. lol!
So, I held that baby in! It was the day I sat down, put my feet up, and said to my husband “Ok, I’m ready now” that she was born. It was her actual due date! I literally held her in, as did the nurses! I was in the hospital for less than 15 minutes before I delivered, and the only reason it took that long is because we had to wait for my doctor to arrive! :) Thankfully, he was only 8 minutes away! lol!